BigLerm.com

I found this log the other day when I was going through my Blackberry.  I was keeping tabs of the events on my bus ride to MI for Thanksgiving.

5PM- Baltimore greyhound has the slowest counter ever.  Lady yells at me because I won’t let her cut in line, even though we are on the same bus.  I feel bad for stupid people… Location: Baltimore, MD

11PM- Bus driver pulls over to yell at the dumb lady from earlier for laughing way too loud while people are trying to sleep.  I wonder what it would feel like to be be yelled at by a bus driver as an adult.  I hope this lady gets her head cut off.  Location: Western Maryland

1AM- Arrive for “meal stop”.  There is like six inches of snow on the ground.  Starts to dawn on me that forgetting coat on trip to MI was a bad idea.  Dude behind me peers between seats in attempt to see what I am furiously typing into my Blackberry.  Everyone gets off the bus to smoke except me.  Location: Somerset, PA

1:20AM-Bus now smells like Cheetos and cigarettes.  Awesome.  Next stop Pitt.  Location: Somerset, PA

2:30AM- Six people get on the bus and wander aimlessly for a few moments before realizing this is not their bus.  Only one other bus here so there is a pretty good chance you’ll get back on the right one.  Darwin would be sad.  Location: Pittsburgh, PA

6AM- Bus driver eating cup o’ noodles very loudly, probably not the best meal option for someone trying to drive.  I consider saying something but the fate of being thrown off the bus in the middle of Ohio scares the shit out of me.  I bite my tongue, fuck you Suckhio.  Location: Somewhere in god awful Ohio

7AM-12PM:  I sleep for the rest of the trip.  When I am not sleeping I pretend to be asleep in order to avoid conversation with any of the strange halfbreed retard fucks that get on the bus in Ohio.  Location: Sadly still Ohio

12:30PM- Arrive in Detroit.  Relieved that no passangers were eaten or raped in the face while driving through Suckhio.